3 posts tagged “nyc”
Last week I watched a lot of The Office, like, all of seasons 1 and 2 in less than a week. And it almost made me wish for a similar life, living in the town I grew up in, at some crappy receptionist or sales job. Somehow TV can make anything glamorous, hmm? But this quote sums up much better how I feel about home, and staying in the place where I grew up; it's from Garden State:
"You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone. ... You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place."
This summer has really reinforced into me this idea. I miss my house that I lived in from age seven to seventeen; but not much else about Kitchener (there are things I enjoy, yeah, like uptown Waterloo, Encore Records [okay. I do miss Encore Records.]). I think it all really started before I moved out, with not having solid roots in Kitchener. I don't blame this all on my surroundings, though I'm sure it helped that I felt like I never had much in common with most of my close friends nearing the end of my living there, I guess I just stopped investing, too (Except,.. I really did love my Grade 12 Drama class...).
My parents are putting the house up for sale next month. They're moving to London for work (both of them). Bye bye Queen's Blvd. My brother & sister-in-law are in London for Brendan's school, and Aaron's still in China. Home is definetly not a place. It's insulting to even think that.
I assume a lot of people have the town where they grew up (if they move away from it) as the place they can always come back for a good time, for reunions of family+friends, rehashing of memories and whatever, eating your favourite burger,blabla. Kitchener isn't that for me, but I can only hope that Toronto will be, when I leave and go whereever else it is I might go (if you know me, you know the plans are grandiose, detailed and long). So... Toronto, you're my new hometown, are you okay with that?
I'm going on my third year of living in the place I love, yet I've lost so many ties with so many people since I've been here (and definetly before,), it's debilitating.
There's so much more to living life than figuring out where "home" is...
Nevertheless,... I'm still between the click of a light and the start of a dream. Us kids know where we know.
I'm at this place lately where I don't want to eat food anymore, I just want to drink coffee. I'm hungy, but I don't wanna put anything in my mouth. Revolting. Archi told me to take up smoking to rid myself of my appetite and then I wouldn't have that problem anymore, ironic considering my superstition about taking up smoking (see entry labeled "pake, i'm trying everything to know you").
I finished my summer course and I'm actually kind of heartbroken about it. The course itself was interesting, and it means I have a lighter courseload this year, but it's the people I'll miss... the characters. Angry Lady, Chatty Cathy, and the lovely friends I made. Toronto gets better the more people I meet. Once I leave I imagine it will be hard to do so... but grad school in Chicago or NYC seems like a definite (Plans plans plans. "many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails";).
Saw my very best friend/eternal friend, Rhobi last night + checked out a book launch of one of our favourite artists.. www.shannongerard.org sheisfantastic. We then ate late at the Green Room & discussed smoking cigarettes, imposing morality and her new life goal to chug a beer faster than her champion-boyfriend. I love bestfriend'sboyfriend; BFB for short (just made that up now).
In other news, Starbucks has been booking me to work on Sunday nights lately: also heartbreaking. Church is Sunday nights. I'm in a place where I need to hear David reciting this calmly postcommunion .. God shows up in this tradition for me.
Numbers 6:24-26
"The LORD bless you
and keep you;
the LORD make his face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the LORD turn his face toward you
and give you peace."
....
I'm still working on understanding GRACE. Oh wait, I never will. It's one of those things.
It's so official, I'm either going to go to Hunter College[CUNY] in NYC or University of Illinois at Chicago for my Master's in Social Work. Both have streams that focus entirely on innercity/anti-poverty/"ground-up" social work. Can't find that anywhere in Canada. Both names are well-known. So it's a race to which city will win my heart first! NYC or Chicago? ...Or which school will accept me. Plus I have to sort out residency shit so I can get cheaper tuition (which looks like living in the state for 12 months before applying... that might get complicated..)... but I'll worry about that next summer.
I'm stoked.
http://www.uic.edu/jaddams/college/
http://www.hunter.cuny.edu/socwork/
Naomi gotsta keep her grades up.
