10 posts tagged “work”

Maybe some of you know that I work in long term, high level, supportive housing for folks who are diagnosed with schizophrenia. imagine 3 row-house with the insides knocked down, 21 single-occupancy rooms, a giant kitchen & a pile of living rooms... and staff 24/7. if you're familiar with Jean Vanier's stuff, we're inspired by his approach to loving people in the margins.

my job is to hang out with residents, support them, cook lunch & dinner, do "informal counselling", "conflict resolution", "crisis intervention"... a bunch of words meaning I'm just there, walking alongside these fellow humans.

it ends up fuelling me with a lot of spiritual nourishment and deep reflection-- very often about consumerism and society.

I was working a night shift last week, having a conversation with a woman who lives not only with schizophrenia but with depression, too.. she started off by stopping me as I walked by, "Hey, Naomi.. what have you learned about mental health working here?"

it kinda felt like a quiz, but I stuttered out an answer, something like, "Well, you know, sure I've learned about diagnoses and medications and other medical things... but I'm far more concerned about the stigma you guys face, the discrimation and oppression from structures, like hospitals and government policy, and from people in society"...

society.
We talked about society. being a societal misfit. & how I love working there because I, too, feel like a societal misfit- I've never felt like I've fit in (which is a thing to be celebrated!). Together, we rejected the idealistic notion of "integrating the mentally ill into society"-- when really, how could I promote that when I don't even want to be integrated myself into a society full of misled values, materialism, consumerism, disregard for the marginalized, self-obsessedness, and so on...

this lead to talking about SUCCESS. she just asked me, again, she's so straight, "Naomi. how do you define success?" & I immediately thought of Jean Vanier (read Becoming Human if you haven't..!!!), and I said,
it's loving people. being compassionate. following your heart. doing what's right.
She'd been fed for so long that since she can't work, she isn't successful. I tried to tell her "no".
we need to stand up against those bullshit ideals.

She went on to say she NEEDED God to get into the bathtub. She trusted God so much that He could help her- and she got in there. It's SO significant. I said that was wonderful, because so many don't acknowledge God & attempt to be strong by themselves. She said, "I don't have a choice".
How beautiful. How amazing, to be in the juxtaposition, of needing God's help SO bad she felt she didn't have another choice.
Now THAT'S success.
why I think it's success is well explained in these two quotes:

"In contemplation we learn to trust God precisely because we need him" - Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove
"the Kingdom of God is for the weak; it's more accessible for those with nothing to lose" -my friend Jess paraphrasing Jesus.

was my last day at starbucks!

my last partner beverage was a double (espresso shot) iced venti soy light ice tazo chai
i threw out my smelly, smelly, smelly work shoes in the garbage there
i squealed when punching out for the last. time.
and hugged and squealed/screamed some more when i left the store with my (soon-to-be ex-barista as well) co-worker
 friend
i wrote everyone a little card
my last drinks made as a barista were a tall non fat no foam latte & a tall no foam latte

it's not that i hated my time there, but it just ain't my calling.

i have a tiny starbucks brochure that is given to new partners that's been taped up in my room for a while, and it says this:

ALONG THE WAY
This may be the place you hang your hat. This may be a stop along the way- to other things, grand ambitions, true callings. Either way, we hope you have fun, make friends and create uplifting experiences that enrich people's daily lives.

i've had this taped up for so long (and usually i do not succumb to starbucks propagandha) because it rings so true. Starbucks was a stop along the way, where I had so much fun & made really important friends and had really important experiences. I believe in the power of a cup of coffee (whereever you might obtain that cup)-- cause it's not just the coffee that has the power(caffeine-wise), it's the experience, the love in it.

this is a story everyone should hear.

last week i was at work; a group home for adults living with mental illnesses [schizophrenia is a diagnosis that affects every individual living in the house ++ much more], and one resident was overwhelmed by all the issues and problems facing her in her life. this Catholic woman ended her long concerns with this "and then i only put a toonie in the offering basket && only 50 cents in the poor box". then i said, without thinking twice, "hey, you know that parable Jesus tells about the poor widow who only puts two pennies into the offering basket?" "yeah..."  "well, i think you're like the widow." "..oh, okay".

mark 12:41-44
Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. many rich people threw in large amounts. but a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins worth only a fraction of a penny.

 calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, "i tell you the truth, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. they all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on."

day two of giving up caffeine:
i'm so exhausted, and it's only 3pm- i got a 8 hour sleep, and all i've done today is go to a housing not war rally & now i'm sitting at school working on an essay.

this sucks.

stay tuned for the next two days: opening at my caffeine-abundant workplace (have to get up at 4:15a).
AHHH!

ok, the whole point of lent is self-sacrifice in order to prepare and reflect on the death&ressurection of Jesus. so i'm going to try to do that. i just need a wee bit of grace.

pipe dreams of co-ownership of a bunny paired with less tolerance for meaningless& ignorant speech.
shitty at-home hair dye jobs and a deep fascination with how much i can live my life controlled by fear.
bad chinese food with tired parents.
yesterday's paper & a burn from a spilled americano.

some new music tonight and back to the old routine tomorrow morning.

last night i dreamt of no-water tazo chais.
ahh Starbucks, stop stealing my dreams!

i'm at my parent's house right now.
i feel like a nomad when i'm here, i drop my crap off in whatever room i'm transplanted to, and just sleep.
always in a bed that ruins my back for the first half of the day.
i forget I have to quiet my voice for baby, and watch too much tv.

i'm tired of my cliche rantings about home.

they move on the 28th to London, and i fly to Alberta on the 26th.
i kind of feel like a jerk about missing helping them move.. they have a lot of work left to do.

i come back to Toronto on the 1st of january.
i'm not sure i'm ready for 2008.
but i don't have a choice.

- stupid- considering my hair colour or not.
- only bearable because of my looks.
- getting drunk on a regular basis.
- studying "Fashion Marketing".
- studying something "shallow.
- too dense to be in university.

So don't assume okay? I don't care if you're kidding, I know you think I'm actually dumb.
Please stop patronizing me and treating me like a child.
Grr, I need grace today. Jesus, help me.

It’s autumn, and I’m a girl sitting in Trinity Bellwoods Park; Americano in my veins and hope and gratitude in my heart.

The summer is over, Cheryl is no longer my roomate & all us regulars are back at Aberdeen. I miss Cheryl; she taught me immeasurable amounts about selfless service and the washing of others' feet [John 13] [she literally washed mine.... good story- I'd love to tell you in person]. I am looking forward to good amounts of concerts this fall, good amounts of hanging out, and good amounts of immersing myself into learning again, into anti-oppressive social work practice and just daily living.

Freedomize's fall launch was this Sunday, and it was fantastique. There was a gospel choir brought in, Cyril rapped, David spoke powerful words, communion as always, induction of wonderful new members, cleansing through tears;... beautiful, beautiful church, I love you.  

Being on the Executive Leadership team at IVCF at school is a lot of work all at once. It's so wonderful to be a part of something so significant and bigger than I could ever imagine. I guess we could say we're labouring lots right now - and looking for fruit through tired eyes... it's also very stretching to be immersed in the lives of others that I wouldn't particularly otherwise spend a lot of time with- it all feels very random. It's still early.

I have pink & brown in my hair now; in high school I used to dye my hair to mark something significant. So I decided to do the same when I passed my G2 test a month ago. Having failed it a ridiculous amount of times, it was something in my life that caused me overwhelming (and unneccesary, and self-consumed) sadness, inadequacy. tension and stress; praise God it's behind me- I'll need his grace again in the same area in a year's time, come my G test....   I'm hoping this collective experience will be used for something beyond my understanding..
Speaking of high school phases, I've readopted thick black eyeliner...

I work at Starbucks where I serve the rich; and at placement I serve the poor.

Starbucks is fine, I have a love-hate relationship with it and I’ve gotten to the point where I’m getting a little sick of their specialty drinks and pastries. I think it will get better once I start making better/stronger connections with my coworkers (oops, I mean fellow partners..haha.) and customers. Though, I’m totally unfaithful, as I fervently prefer the independent coffee shop/espresso bar with sweet music by my house.

My placement is at a permanent housing solution for 21 people who live with a mental illness. It’s very stretching and life-changing, I feel like everyday I understand the deep, deep scope of mental illness a little bit more, and how drastically it affects lives. Everyone in the house is different, which makes for different ways of interaction with each resident. Don’t tell anyone, but I have a favourite…. a sweet little Indian lady – today we went to the mall to buy batteries for her glucometer & she shared her french fries with me. Everyday I’m at placement includes the dodging of inappropriate questions directed my way; lots of laughs; awkward moments for me but not for those with flat affects; sitting on meetings with doctors, personal support workers, social workers, psychiatrists, housing workers; and a whole lot of grace, and well, compassion.

On top of everything, most importantly- God reveals who he is to me a little bit more everyday (if I choose to listen and open my eyes/heart) and he’s showing me over and over again to live life one day at a time. Dreaming for the future is so, so good, but- so is dreaming for the present.

I'm sunburnt!
This job is warming up to me again. It's random, and that's not so bad. I like my co-workers, and my boss... I think I just might be sad to leave in September.

 

PS If you wanna comment on my blog, get a Vox account - do it! you don't have to update it. i'm feeling lonely. haha.

So, I got a second job at Golden Griddle as a server (with no experience unless you count Tim Horton's) and started this weekend. I had to go out and buy black pants, suitable black shoes and a white shirt for my uniform since I didn't own any of those. Yes, most normal people do own a white collared shirt and plain black pants but I, do not. I think it is against my nature to be able to dress up on a regular basis, or dress up right, at least. Anyway so I was in H&M yesterday picking up any pair of black pants & any white collared shirt I could find and somehow ended up at home with hilarious clothes. I bought black linen pants (linen? Who am I, Jerry Garcia?) for some reason. I was about to return them today then thought it might be a good idea to keep them, especially considering my future plans include an array of hot climates. Still. Linen pants. I am hilariously awkward. I also bought a white shirt that makes me look pretty frumpy and black skinny pants. I'm laughing at myself, because all throughout highschool I'd make fun of my Mom for liking tapered leg pants. Then, I go buy into it once it's fashionable again, but only after it's been so for about a year. Again, I am hilariously awkward. I work there tonight from 5-9pm. (I've been here at the Career Centre since 9am, and I finish at 5). Life's just funny/weird.